


Boxed in

by Blush8657



Category: Bill Clinton - Fandom, Billary - Fandom, HILLARY CLINTON - Fandom, Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: F/M, Humor Mixed In, Oral Sex, PWP, Porn With Plot, Psychological Thriller, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-05
Updated: 2018-09-13
Packaged: 2019-05-02 14:47:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14547048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blush8657/pseuds/Blush8657
Summary: The couple is trapped.(Set, 2012; SOS years)





	1. How Did We Get Here?

**Author's Note:**

> So, Blush8657 and I decided to write a fic together. After pulling straws (har har), I am writing the first chapter. Neither of us knows where this is headed, but it's gonna be a fun ride with (hopefully) a TON OF SEX. We hope you enjoy!

Watching Bill focus as she sat in the corner, she wondered if she’d set a world record during her tenure. How many people could say they’d masturbated while flying over 112 countries, just feet from a travelling press corps who considered her more robot than human? But she was certainly human—if not a completely horny one—most nights in the sky, wishing her husband was performing the act she imagined as her fingers grazed over her wet, juicy lips, trying to mimic the way his would skillfully set her ablaze. She’d called his name out many times on those occasions—once so loud that the new flight attendant, also named “Bill”, rushed to her cabin when he heard the call. She was startled by his frantic knocking until she remembered their earlier introduction. “Sorry,” she giggled, trying to steady her heavy breathing, “I was, uhm, talking to my husband on the phone.”

As she stared at _her_ Bill grazing his hand along the walls with focused precision, those 40,000-foot flights were a thing of the past. She was retiring, happy to start a new life of leisure, if only for a year or two. But that day, as she thought about the last four years of horny nights and endless travel, she and her husband were trapped in a 12x12x12 foot windowless and doorless room with no explanation for why they were there or where the light was coming from.

“There’s got to be…” Bill said, hand grazing the walls at a different height as he circled the room once again.

Her eyes zeroed in on his fingers, the middle one seeming extra long as it trailed the others, his prints running along the white walls, leaving a bit of DNA, no doubt, as he continued. She took a breath, still so aroused by them, having flashbacks about those same lithe fingers parting her lips before entering in, and she, clinging to them as though she depended on them for life and sustenance, trapping them deep inside as his thumb pressed against her nub, dancing upon that pearl like a figure skater. There _was_ a beauty to it, she always thought, feeling herself open as the fantasy overtook her. But then she sat up straight, because this moment was serious, and they were trapped, and she was doing little, if anything, to help him escape.

“What the fuck?” he whispered, stunned by their situation. “There’s got to be a way out of here.” He looked up at the ceiling, mouth ajar. “We got in here some way.”

She nodded. “We did.”

He stood on his toes, middle finger trying to touch the high ceiling, but it was feet away, and he lowered his arm, jaw clenched. “Maybe,” he said, stomping along the floor, “the door is down here.”

“Billy…”

“Because,” he continued, house shoes not as hard as he needed, “we got in here some way.”

“Bill.”

He looked up.

She took a breath. “You’re gonna overexert yourself. Right now, we’re trapped, and using all your energy isn’t gonna solve this.”

“Sitting around isn’t gonna solve this either, Hillary.”

“So how did we get in here?”

“I don’t know,” he said, choosing to take off his shoes as he continued stomping. “But to accept defeat isn’t an option.” After stomping along the entire floor, he lowered his head, completely frustrated.

“Bill.”

He looked up again, seeing her still sitting in that corner as though they weren’t in a dire situation. She patted the floor next to her, and he made his way, sitting down as she wrapped her arms around him.

“Let’s just accept this situation for a moment,” she cooed, kissing his forehead. “It’s been a long while since you and I were alone in a room.”

He closed his eyes. “Baby, I don’t know where we are. Neither of us has eaten anything, and besides that water bottle over there, we’re the only two things in the room.”

She swallowed, focusing on the available tools. “You’re wearing a belt.” He looked down. “And I’m wearing an underwire. This light has to be coming from somewhere,” she said, still unsure of where. “We just need to find an electrical source.”

Bill nodded. “And then what?”

“And then,” she said, still calm as she looked around, “we could probably trigger an alarm if we used some water to wet the source.”

“What if we start a fire?”

“We’ll only use an ounce,” she said, thinking of scenarios. “Then we can use the rest to douse the flames—if there are flames.”

“Alright,” he said, heart-rate calming, “but what if no one’s outside of this room? What if the alarm goes off and no one can hear it but us?” he asked, hand moving up her side, because she smelled so good, and he missed her so much, and they were there, alone, in that weird, illogical room. He cupped her breast, finding comfort in her entire aura, but then he pulled away, because everything couldn’t be about sex. Could it?

“Why’d you stop?”

“We’re trapped.”

“So?” she said, moving his hand back to her breast.

Accepting the invitation, he squeezed it ever-so-slightly, eliciting a moan from his oddly stable wife, her perfectly plump lips just begging to be kissed. So he kissed them as his other hand squeezed her other breast. “You taste so good.”

She smiled. “So do you.”

And then the light got dimmer, and they pulled away, pausing as their eyes darted around the room. “Hill?”

“Billy?”

He swallowed. “Do…do you think we, uh?”

“No way,” she said, unable to accept that reality, but she had to test it. “Kiss me again,” she demanded, and he did, hands rested to her hips. And the light got brighter, and they pulled away.

“It’s us.”

“It can’t be,” she said, suddenly standing.

He focused on the corners, still not knowing where the light was coming from. “We control the light, Hill. Every time we kiss, it changes.”

“That’s crazy,” she said, hand grazing the walls in his earlier pattern. “If we control the room, then why are we trapped in here?”

He closed his eyes, because she’d expect this response from him, and he hated that he was playing true to character, even though he was being serious. “Maybe we could fuck our way out?”

She paused, staring at him, because that was such a typical thing for him to say. She knew he had a point, even if his statement was selfish, but she couldn’t remember where they were before they ended up in that room. And she suddenly had a vision of them fucking their way into another realm—into that room—and his statement carried weight. “We have to cover our bases first.”

“We’ve already gotten to first base,” he said, grinning slyly. “The light’s might get dimmer if we get to second base.”

“Let’s look for the electrical source,” she said, equally determined to play hard to get as she was to escape.

“And when you accept that it’s us?” he asked, grazing the walls again.

She licked her lips, parched as she averted her eyes. “Then there’s no doubt that we’ll _definitely_ escape this room.”


	2. Lollipop

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so I'm nowhere near the talent that Anirtak is to I apologise in advance! As she has stated, we have no idea what we are doing with this, lol.
> 
> Anyway, here is my 2nd chapter. 
> 
> WARNING - This chapter contains sexualy explicit content. Do not read if you are easily offended or underage.
> 
> Otherwise, enjoy!
> 
> Blush x

"Shit" Hillary huffed. There _was_  no source. Not as far as their extensive search concluded. She suddenly grasped at thin air, almost losing her balance. "Careful Bill!" she yelled before steading herself. 

 

"Sorry honey" Bill grunted. "I love your ass. You know I do...but I'm not sure it belongs on my shoulders...maybe my face...I'm an old man..." His face reddening, legs getting more and more unsteady.

 

Hillary flared her nostrils. "Well it was _your_ idea! Anyway, this is ridiculous. Let me down."

 

Bill lowered himself down as gently as he could and allowed Hillary to slip off before sinking to the floor and collapsing.

 

She wandered the length of the small room, fingers grazing against the walls. Not a bump or a ridge to be felt...unlike...- 'Stop it Hill.'

 

"I'm so hot..." she mumbled, removing her suit jacket and flinging it into a corner. "Ok think Bill...where were we before this? Why can't we remember?"

 

Bill was now sat up , leanining against the wall. "Wow...." he sighed at the vision before him. It played out almost in slow motion. His wife running her fingers through her long, golden locks, the jiggle of her breasts as she removed her outer layer, the thin silk camisole damp and clinging to her like an extra skin, nipples hard and protruding invitingly...wait- "No bra?!" He blurted out excitedly.

 

Hillary blinked her eyes in disbelief. "Have you listed to a word I've said??" 

 

"Truthfully hun...no." Bill grinned sheepishly. "Why don't you relax a minute and come sit here", he growled pointing to his lap.

 

Hillary bit her bottom lip. She didn't know whether it was the stifling heat or the fact that they were in an unfamiliar place without another soul present. No aids, no agents...no-one.

 

"You're a terrible distraction Mr President" she replied coyly as she sauntered over to him. "What is it that you want me to do?"

 

The tone of innocence was not lost on him and he smirked. Reaching his hands out, he helped lower her onto his lap so that she was straddling him. "Mmmm...that's better..." 

 

Hillary squirmed, she could feel his hardness pressing her crotch through his jeans. 

 

"Come closer..." Bill drawled as her closed the gap between their mouths. Their lips caressing one anothers slowly, tentatively, before an urgency took over. Tongues swirled against the other's , teeth grazing and biting. 

 

Bill groaned as he felt his dick harden further. "Babe...He needs to be let free" he mumbled into her mouth. 

 

Hillary smirked and scooted lower down on Bill's legs. Never breaking eye contact, she managed to unfasten his jeans and pull out his throbbing member. 

 

Her  heart jumped as she felt the hot flesh pulse in her hand. Her fingers and thumb not quite able to meet due to his girth. She wrapped her fingers around as tightly as she could pumped his dick up and down before swirling  a finger over the head. He was already oozing pre cum, allowing her to use it as lubrication.

 

"What do you want me to do?" She asked huskily. Bill's eyes were glazed and heavy. He merely raised his eyebrows in response.

 

Lowering herself further so that she would be at a comfortable angle, Hillary licked her lips before descending her mouth down over the shiny, red head. She swirled her tongue delicately over the senstive ridge as Bill's eyes rolled back into his head. 

 

Bill let out an uncontrolled groan as inch by inch, his wife's wet mouth enveloped his large dick and worked her way expertly around it. Her tongue licking up and down, her hollow cheeks creating the perfect pressure of suction...

 

"Oh fuck Hillary...you're amazing..." he panted as her grabbed her hair into a fist at the top of her head. 

 

He fumbled about for his phone camera  to preserve the memory of the sight before him. His wife, the Secretary of State, one of the most powerfull women in the world, was bent before him, her mouth stretched over his thick shaft, her lips swollen and sensual and hair messy and tousled.  Though he hated to admit it, he knew many a man had his eye on her. He saw the way they flirted, the way they touched her. And she flirted back. 

 

'Well now those son's of bitches will know for sure that she is off limits' he thought as he hit send under the 'Assholes 2012' Whatsapp chatgroup consisting of all the male world leaders past and present. 'Dontchya wish ya girlfriend was hot like mine ;-) ' he quickly typed  as a caption before flinging his phone aside.

 

Hillary's hot mouth was working it's magic. He felt his balls tighten and begin to tingle. "Baby...honey, stop" Bill groaned. "I'm going to cum if you keep doing this..."

He felt her smile against his dick but continue at the pace she was going. If anything, she seemed to have tightened her mouth around him and was taking him deeper.

"Oh fuuuucckkk...." His ass suddenly clenched as he felt the head of his dick hit the back of her throat and then further down. It was happening. He felt a tingling start from somewhere deep in his balls, before  igniting into a mass of explotions travelling right up and along the core of his pulsating cock. He thrust furiously as he felt his cum shooting out of him. Being the trooper that she was, Hillary did not miss a beat and not a drop escaped her lips.

 

Bill was sure he had blacked out for a moment before coming to. Hillary still licking his now softening member. 

"Oh my fuck...you're... incredble..." he said faintly. 

 

Hillary popped him out her mouth an looked up suddenly concerned. "Bill?...Are you ok? Did I over do it?" Her voice even huskier than before.

 

Bill felt as though he was floating. "Baby I'm good... I just need some sugar".

 

Hillary swatted his leg. "Bill I'm serious!"

 

"So am I... can you check my pocket for a mint?"

 

"Oh...uh...there's nothing here..." She ran her fingers through the pockets of his jeans. "Oh wait... a gummy bear?" 

 

"It'll do." Bill took it off her and popped it into his mouth.

 

* * *

 

 

Joe sauntered to his car carrying three Food World bags in each hand.

 

"Yep, it's me sweetcheeks. Your friendly neighbourhood VP" he winked at a young woman clearly engrossed in her mobile phone screen. "DM me!" he hollered as she scuttled away.

 

A bright yellow wrapper reflecting the sun onto his aviators caught his eye. "What's this?" he mused bending down.

 

An opened but almost full packet of gummy bears. 'This is a good day for old Joe...!' he thought before grabbing a handfull and popping them into his mouth.

 

* * *

 

 

"Feel better?" Hillary asked as she lay her head on Bill's chest.

 

Before he could answer, the a deep rumbling began to reverbate around the room before seeming to thunder into the centre. The walls shook dangerously and they were sure the floor would give way beneath them. 

 

Bill and Hillary looked at each other in alarm. "Earthquake!!

 

A blinding white light flashed throught the room forcing the couple to shield their faces.

 

As quickly as it all started, the noises and shaking stopped.

 

"Hilton??... Bill??"

 

Hillary and Bill turned around in shock to find a familiar figure standing in the middle of the room, arms still laden with grocery bags.

 

"Joe??" They yelled in unison.

 

Joe frowned and closed his eyes, keeping very still.

 

"Joe how di-"

 

He cut Hillary off with a flick of his hand, silencing her. He sniffed lightly. Then deeper. Followed by a quick succession of sniffs. His face suddenly broke into a grin. He pointed at them knowingly and air hi-fived Bill, who returned the hi -five but was quickly swatted down by Hillary.

 

She stood up and walked to Joe in bewilderment. "Joe! How the Hell did you get in here?!" Grabbing a bag out his hand, she rifled through, pulling out a bottle of water and packet of goldish crackers.

 

Joe set the rest of the bags down. "Nothing vegan in here for you", he nodded to Bill. "I'ma _real_ man" he winked as he eyed Hillary skeevily.

 

Bill stood up before tackling Joe to the floor. "How the FUCK did you get in here. And how do we get OUT, you asshole?!"

 

Joe processed to start ticking Bill to get him off. "It's a crazy fucking story man! You wouldn't believe me!"

 

"Try me". Hillary replied deadpan.


	3. Be Gone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to be good--really--but then Blush triggered me, and now we're all stuck in insanity land.

Still grinning as Bill let him go, Joe strutted to the other side of the room. Suddenly, he furrowed his brow and sniffed the air.  “You sucked him off?!”

“Joe!”

“Mother fucker!” Joe mumbled, eating Goldfish. He nodded, calming.  “Doesn’t matter,” he said, opening his phone.  His eyes grew big once he saw the picture from Bill.  “She took it all the way in!”

“Give me that!” Hillary yelled, snatching the phone before smashing it.  “How did you get in here, Joe?!  And how can we get out?!”

“Alright!” he said, still pissed about the photo.  “I was minding my business, using one of those Obama Food Stamp cards to get necessities from the Chappaqua Food World,” he said, grocery bags filled with unnecessary items. “You wouldn’t believe their prices.  Did you know that you can get three ass-shaped beach balls when you purchase _four_ jars of Chunky Ass Bacon peanut butter? Don’t even get me started on the—”

“Hurry up!” Bill screamed.

“Fine!” Joe yelled, closing the peanut butter. “After I signed a couple hundred autographs in the parking lot, I picked up a bag of gummy bears and BOOM! Here the fuck I am!”

Exasperated, Bill closed his eyes while Hillary squinted hers.  “So you just magically ended up here?”

“Yeah,” Joe said, throwing a raw steak at Bill, “but since this place already smells like sex, why don’t we—?”

“Enough!” she said, snatching his chin.

“Shit!”

She let him go. “Okay,” she said, deep in thought, “I just fed Bill a gummy bear, and you just ate _a bag_ of gummy bears.”  Nothing made sense as she paced the room, but as she kept glancing at Bill, she couldn’t fight her arousal. 

“Hill?” Bill said, noticing her state of mind.

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not,” he drawled, ready to ravish her.  “Come sit with me.”

“No,” she whispered.

“Hilly…”

“Not with Joe here,” she said, rolling her eyes at the man.  “You’d think my husband and I would get _one_ day to be trapped alone in a windowless, doorless room without having company.”

“Whoa, whoa!” Joe said, holding his hands up as he kept chewing.  “ _I_ didn’t ask to be here, Hillsex! Just because Ol’ Joe magically appeared after eating some abandoned gummies shouldn’t mean that you can’t get off because of me!  It’s about time I get to see your ass in action anyway!  How many times do I have to tell you I’m here whenever you fucking need to be fucked?!”

She charged toward him. “You need to leave!”

As she choked him, he grinned.  “Fuck—ing—how?” he stammered.  “You’re stuck with me, _and_ my 20/20 vision, _and_ my hard-on!”

Sitting in the corner, Bill nodded, holding his tongue in his cheek.  “Hill?”

She looked at him. 

“We need to get rid of him.”

“Honey,” she said, shaking her head, “we can’t even get ourselves out.”

“When I ate that gummy,” he said, thinking back, “this fucker appeared.  Now, I just have to get rid of that gummy.”

“Bill,” she said, knowing what he meant, “don’t.  The space is too small, and none of these bottles have tops.”

He picked up the water bottle and poured it out.  “Apparently, gummy bears liquify in the stomach and turn into instant piss.  Read that in my Men’s Health magazine”

“That’s not true, fucker!”

“So,” Bill said, swinging the bottle to remove all the liquid, “I’m gonna pee.”

“No!” Joe screamed, incensed.  “I _have_ to see you guys fuck!  It’s my dying wish!”

“Do it,” Hillary demanded.

Focusing hard, Bill peed into the bottle, nearly filling it to the top.  “Babe, I need another,” he grunted, trying to hold the stream.

She poured out Joe’s coke.

“Dammit!” he screamed, suddenly parched, “that was a man’s soda!  The fucker’s pee can’t handle it!”

“Here,” Hillary said, handing Bill the new bottle. 

Relieved, he continued peeing, and the room got brighter.

“Whoa,” Joe said, flicking in and out of sight.  “Fuck you, Bill!  Just because you have a windowless and doorless sex dungeon doesn’t mean you can—!”  He disappeared.

Hillary took a deep breath, thankful he was gone.  “Finally,” she said, walking towards Bill.

“Yeah,” Bill said, miffed that he saw the man.  “I hate when people drop by when I’m getting ready to eat.”

Hillary quirked her eyebrows.  “Eat?”

He looked up.  “Your pussy, Hill.  No way you’re gonna have all the fun in our sex dungeon.  For fuck’s sake, the only vegan thing in here besides those ass-shaped beach balls is your pussy.  I’ve never been happier to diet, Hill.”

“Honey,” she cooed, so happy about his plan.  “Do you think we should keep doing this?” she asked, taking off her pants.  “I mean, we’re trapped in this windowless, doorless room without knowing how we got here or how we can leave.  Shouldn’t we focus on finding a way out?” she breathlessly asked as Bill lay on his stomach, feet pointed towards the ceiling.  He licked her like she was the finest of ice creams.  “ _Fuck_ ,” she moaned, pressing his head to her pussy.

Suddenly, the room got so dark that they could barely see each other. 

“Billy,” she said, right on edge, “what’s happening?”

Too engrossed, he mumbled, “don’t know.”

She swallowed, face distorted in delight, “Honey, I can barely _s-s-see_ ,” she moaned, toes curling as he circled her clit before lapping her quickly, each ounce of arousal covering his chin as she— “Fuck!” she screamed.

The room became pitch black and was only filled with their heavy breathing.

“Bi—billy?”

He swallowed, too thrilled about eating to have adequate fear about the light.  “Hill?”

She still tried to catch her breath.  “I can’t—I can’t see anything.”

“I thought—I thought that was just me, baby.  I was willing to accept absolute blindness after making you come.  I figured that was the price for Enlightenment.”

“You’re—you’re gonna have to make me come again,” she said, swallowing.  “The light correlates to our arousal.”

Overwhelmed, Bill quickly unzipped his pants.  “Let’s do this!”


	4. Ferrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guuyys... I do not know what it happening here....but enjoy nonetheless!
> 
> All feedback and comments are encouraged :)

"Oh yes, fuck! Harder baby, fuck me harder!" Hillary screamed, wild and unabandoned. She closed her eyes, savouring every sensation Bill's dick was creating from behind her. "I'm so close..." 

The sweat dripped down from Bill's forehead and landed on Hillary's lusciously scrumptious ass. He groaned at the sight. Yes, thanks to Hillary's fourth orgasm, they were now enveloped in an almost unearthly glow. And Bill couldn't be more grateful. There was nothing he loved more than fucking Hillary doggystyle and the satisfaction of seeing her tight cunt swallow up his monster over and over. She was a work of art. Never mind the Mona Lisa, he had the ' _Moana' HiIlary_ '   right here. *Snigger*

He let out a groan as Hillary's wet pussy clamped around his throbbing dick. "Fuck babe, I can feel you...!"

Hillary's couldn't concentrate on anything but Bill's head rubbing gloriously on her g-spot. Her back suddenly stiffened and arched as the tight coil unravelled within her. Her toes curled and her eyes rolled back into her head as her pussy exploded into the most intense orgasm she had had in a long time. "Oh my God..." she wailed.

Bill tried fuck her through it, but could hold it no longer. Her held her close as he shot his seed into her in hot, creamy spurts. 

"I can feel _you_..." she panted before passing out from the intensely satisfying pounding.

* * *

 

"Damn Hill...Mmpghg e shchchsl mmmmmkek ehedufh sdkjfhafhia ---" Bill tore through Joe's grocery bags, shoveling almost a whole baguette into his mouth.

Hillary sat on the floor sipping on a bottle of water, having gotten herself a little more presentable again. "What??"

"I said, maybe we should make it a point to get locked in a doorless, windowless room more often!" 

She smirked, and closed her eyes, still basquing in the afterglow.

"Hehehe..."

"What?" She asked Bill.

"What?" 

"What's funny?"

Bill looked at her, confused. "Erm...well, White Chicks is pretty much a comedic masterpiece...?"

"Heeheeheee!!"

"Why are you talking about? And stop that giggling. It's unnerving coming from a grown man!" She huffed.

"What are  you talking about?? I don't giggle!"

Bill's ears pricked up.

"Hahahahaaaa!" 

He heard it too. A gleeful cackling from.... Bill eyed the room suspiciously. Save for Hillary and himself, it was empty... but the sound...

He strided to the far corner and reached out. Nothing.  He waved his hand about until -

"Hey fucker! Thats my eye!"

Bill almost choked on his own saliva. "Joe?!"

Hillary shot up. 

"That's right asshole. The greatest Vice President of the United States of America lives to fight another day!"

"But-but we got rid of you!" Hillary exclaimed in shock, bringing a hand to her mouth.

Bill and Hillary exchanged alarmed glances.

"Hahahahahahhaahaaaaaa..." 

Bill, making an educated guess, hooked his hand around thin air. He couldn't see him, but he could damn well feel him. He tightened his hold, producing a strangled, choking sound.

"Good" Hillary muttered. 

Much to their amazement, the harder Bill strangled Joe, the more visible he became. First, his face... Almost as though he was appearing from a dull black and white, to full colour. Then his torso, followed by the rest of him.

"What the fuck you old pervert!" screamed Bill.

Not at all deterred by Bill's assault, Joe continued cackling, face reddening by the second.

"You -- you thought...." He gasped trying to catch his breath. " You thought pissing in a bottle would get rid of me...!!" 

Enraged, Bill flung him to the ground and put him in a head lock. He did not however bet on Joe being as quick as he was, for moments later, he howled in pain and dropped Joe with a thud, clutching at his chest.

Hillary, who was watching the scene unfold with great disinterest, now rushed to Bill.

"Bill, honey whats wrong?? Is it your heart??" 

Bill squeezed his eyes shut, gasping dramatically. "He...he gave me a...a purple nurple. On both nipples!" 

"Shut up asshole!" Joe yelled trying to catch his breath.

"Oh for f-" Hillary was growing weary of this. She grabbed Joe by the cuff of his collar and yanked him up.

"So you really do like it rough Hildawg..." He winked knowingly and licked his lips.

She rolled her eyes. "I hope you got a good look, cos that's all your're gonna get from me. And one word to anybody else..." she warned.

"Just between you and me, and Elvis, cupcake." 

"Elvis??" Both Clinton's chimed.

Joe clicked his tongue and grabbed at his crotch before casually fingering his jean pockets and popping something into his mouth.

They glared as he chewed noisily.

"Oh my bad... Gummy bear?" He held his hand out.

Hillary looked closer to find a handfull of gummy's coverd in fluff. Her eyes flashed in anger.

"Joe." She said in a calm and measured tone. "I thought you said you ate the gummy bears you found."

"I said I popped them into my mouth Hilarious, I didn't eat them all. I like to suck the sugar off and keep 'em for later, you know?", he explained as he swallowed his sweetie. "I'm not one to waste a gift. Unlike this one here..." He cocked his head towards Bill.

"Uh-huh, I see." Hillary nodded.

**SMACK**

Joe stumbled back, and yelped out in pain. He was not expecting the right hook that met with his jaw. "Hilton!"

"Oh I'm not done!" She lunged forward and bitch slapped him twice for good measure.

"Hill, honey, stop, stop!" Bill took pity and grabbed her from behind in a bear hug and lifted her off of Joe. 

"Yeah, you better cry, you 'lil bitch" she screamed, legs kicking the air frantically. "He had those damn gummy's this whole time Bill! We coulda -"

 

Suddenly, the room began to shake and the walls spun furiously, a deafening rumbling filled the room.

"Wha- What's happening??" Joe cried. He leapt up and grabbed hold of both Clintons.

"Bill!" Hillary screamed as a tornado pulled her into the centre and disappeared.

"Hillaryyyyy!!" He lunged forward, missing her by inches. 

"Let her go man! We gotta stay aliiiiiiii---" 

Bill grabbed on to Joe's leg, as he too was pulled into the spinning tornado.

Everything went black. There was no sound, no movement, just silence. He could see Joe next to him, but it was as though they were in each of their own bubbles. And then, they were falling...

_**CRASH!!!** _

Bill landed first, face down on a bed. 

"Ooof!" Joe exclaimed as he crashed to the floor, missing the bed entirely.

"What the fuck was---"

"Bill!" Hillary ran to him as he sat up , and embraced him. 

"Oh my God, honey are you ok??" he asked checking her over.

"I'm fine." she nodded.

"Yeah I think I've got a concussion..." Joe stood up unsteadily.

"Where are we?" Bill looke around.

"We're in some sort of a hotel room...look, theres a mini bar and and menu...but it's not in English."

"Lemme see that here..." Joe snatched it out of Hillary's hands. "Waaaiitt....wait, wait, wait...."

"What?" Bill and Hillary both asked simultaneously.

"My friends, this is Russian." Joe nodded knowingly.

"What? How do you know??"

"I pay some of my girls in reubles..." He nudged Bill.

"Ugh" Hillary exclaimed in disgust. "Well what the Hell are we doing in a Russain hotel room for goodness sake!"

"Never mind that, what in the tarnation is THAT??! " Bill shouted, walking to a strange straw like object sitting on the head of a fat mannequin.

All three peered at the object in disgust and fascination.

"D'you think it's a ferret?" Joe enquired.

"Mmm...nah it doesn't look alive...but... it seems to be breathing..." Bill replied.

They were unexpectedly interrupted with the sound of keys being inserted into a lock.

All three looked at each other... "Hide!!"


	5. Drip, Drop, Drink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This must be how it feels to be on hard drugs, lol.

Chapter 5

Gasping suddenly, Hillary shot up and looked around the room. They were still trapped, the walls tall and silent, jarring, really, without a window or a door. As Bill lay next to her, she spotted the grin on his sleeping face, and there was no way she was gonna suffer her panic alone.

“Hey,” she whispered, nudging his shoulder.

He stirred, and held to her torso. “ _Fuck_ ,” he mumbled, so disappointed.

“I know, honey,” she said, caressing his face, “we’re still here, but we’ll find a way out.”

“No,” he said, so upset, “I thought you’d given me a blowjob! I even sent the picture out to my fucking World Leaders’s WhatApp chat, and that bastard Joe saw it!” He paused. “Fucker!”

“Bill!”

He swallowed, still groggy. “Baby, did we fuck at least?”

“You had a dream,” she said, pushing him off her.

Thinking back, he furrowed his brow. “It was unlike anything I’ve ever dreamed before, Hill. Besides us fucking each other like our lives depended on it, Joe suddenly appeared after I ate a single gummy bear I’d kept in my right pocket.”

“A gummy bear?”

He nodded. “For my low blood sugar after sex.”

She licked her lips.

“You know I have that problem!”

“And then what?” she asked, oddly willing to listen to his retelling. She realized there’d be little entertainment while they were stuck, so she humored him.

“And then,” Bill said, the dream having been so vivid, “I pissed out the gummy to make Joe go back to hell.” He looked down. “He threw a steak at me, Hillary.”

She closed her eyes.

“Then you and I fucked like jackrabbits! Your ass was so shiny.”

“God, Bill.”

“It was, Hillary! Then that fucker reappeared, because he was stalking us or some weird shit, and then an earthquake happened or a tornado, and we ended up in fucking Russia staring at a fucking ferret before you woke me!”

She took a breath. “That’s all?”

“Yeah,” he said, wide-eyed.

“No balloons?”

He shook his head. “It’s this fucking room, Hillary. I think it’s triggering my already vivid imagination on a scale never seen before in history.” He paused. “My dick was two feet long!”

“Enough!” she said, wishing she would’ve stopped him earlier. “Gosh, why can’t you ever have a normal dream?”

“About what, Hillary?!”

“I don’t know. Maybe about me being president.”

He grinned. “I’ve dreamed of that since the spring of 1971.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah,” he cooed, cuddling close. “Then I’d be the first man to ever fuck a president, assuming those rumors about Lincoln aren’t true.” He looked down. “But hell, we’re democrats. We have a big tent! Whenever we get outta here, I’m gonna go to Greenwich Village and get one of those rainbow flags! I’ll hang it on the shed! _All_ girl-on-girl action is welcomed there!”

“God,” she said, standing up and wandering the room. Because she had no plan, she struggled to hold it together. “Honey, I don’t know how much more I can take of this.”

“Hilly…”

“Really,” she said, trying her best to remain steady. She circled the room again, deep in thought. “When we kissed, the lights got brighter.”

“They did,” he said, watching her circle.

“Okay,” she said, still thinking. “In that case, there has to be a way to get some food.”

Bill furrowed his brow as he stood, and when he kissed Hillary, the lights got brighter. “Alright,” he said, nodding. “What happens if I…?” he said, rubbing her ass.

“Honey…”

“Just a minute,” he said, making circles across her backside. Suddenly, they heard dripping and saw a pin-sized hole form in the ceiling. “Hill…”

“Oh my God,” she said, seeing the first drop fall. “Billy…”

He rubbed her with both hands, and the hole got bigger. “Lay down, baby! If I rub your ass fast enough, I can quench my thirst!”

“Hurry!” she yelped.

He rubbed her ass faster and deeper, and she couldn’t help but enjoy the feeling. “ _Oh yesss….”_

“It’s pouring, Hillary!” He squeezed his eyes closed. “Lord, I’d love a Diet Coke right about now.” Still rubbing Hillary, he opened one eye and only saw water. “…fuck.”

“Straddle me,” Hillary demanded, rolling over, and Bill did. The couple looked around the room and saw no immediate change. “Okay, uhm…kiss my neck.”

“Yes!” Bill said, nibbling on her neck.

“Gosh, Billy,” she giggled, so ticklish.

“You like that?”

“I…do,” she said, nearly breathless. Suddenly, a bowl appeared.

**_CLINK!_ **

They looked up, and Bill made his way towards the dish. “Where the fuck did this come from?”

“What’s in it, honey?”

Bill looked inside. “Two pills.” He picked up the note at the bottom. “ _Fill the bowl with water to swallow_.” He flipped the card. “ _Vegan Salisbury Steak_.” “Vegan!? Even when in prison?!”

Starving, the two looked at each other. “Let’s swallow them, Bill.”

“But what if it’s a trap, Hillary?! These pills are fucking blue, like an unlucky bastard’s ballsack.”

“I’m so hungry,” she said, looking pale.

Bill closed his eyes and made his way to the water. “Alright,” he said, filling the bowl, “but if this doesn’t taste like steak, I don’t know what kind of tantrum I’ll have.” He handed her a pill and then the bowl.

She swallowed the first pill, and Bill followed with the second. They stood in silence, waiting for something to happen.

“Fuck!”

“Bill!”

“I thought we were gonna float just like the Charlie and his grandpa in Willy Wonka!”

“It’s not candy, Bi—” She paused. “Whoa.”

Bill’s eyes grew big as he held to his midsection. “Whoa,” he said, too.

“Honey, I—”

“Me, too,” he stammered, meandering to the wall. “Hilly…”

“Bill…” she stammered, writhing on the floor.

The couple collapsed, alone, with no one to help them survive.


	6. Recap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok...I still don't know what's going on. My brain is forming words at random and I am typing them out. Sorrynotsorry.
> 
> All feedback and comments are encouraged!  
> Blush x

** Earlier that day… **

Joe sauntered to his car carrying three Food World bags in each hand.

 "Yep, it's me sweet cheeks. Your friendly neighbourhood VP", he winked at a young woman clearly engrossed in her mobile phone screen. "DM me!" he hollered as she scuttled away.

 A bright yellow wrapper reflecting the sun onto his aviators caught his eye. "What's this?" he mused bending down.

 An opened but almost full packet of gummy bears. 'This is a good day for old Joe...!' he thought before grabbing a handful and popping them into his mouth.

He proceeded to skip merrily to his car when –

“Oh… I don’t feel so good…” He clutched at his suddenly vibrating stomach. “…Wait…did I remove the…” he pondered patting the region of his asscheeks.

White light flashed before him, rendering him temporarily blind. He could feel movement, a loud clapping of thunder and a whoosh of air surround him.

“This is it!” He screamed fearfully. “This is how it ends! Big Guy..” he prayed. “I know we’ve never spoken before. But uh… I had to be me, ya know? If you could ju- AAAAAHHHH!” Joe let out an ear-piercing scream, as, still clinging on to his grocery bags for dear life, he felt himself lift off the ground and shoot through the air at what seemed like 200miles per minute before feeling as though he was let go of whatever gravitational pull had swept him away and was ~~left~~ to fall through the air. “WHAATTT THEEE FUUUUUCCCCKKKKKK ---”

**_CRASH!!!_ **

Pain shot through him as he landed flat on his back.

“Mother fucker!!!” He yelled, winded.

Blinking his eyes rapidly, Joe looked around. Darkness surrounded him.

“Great Zeus, I’m still blind!!” He cried dramatically. However, after a few minutes, he found that his eyes were adjusting, and he could just about make out the contents or… the lack of content in what appeared to be a room. He looked around for a window or a door. An opening of any sort. Nada.

Panicked, Joe scrambled up, and ran aimlessly until he his foot hit something soft, but solid. He toppled forward and landed on it heavily.

Hands searching tentatively, Joe felt about at the mass. Soft, firm…warm.

Sweat beaded on his forehead. His hands travelled further up. He gasped and immediately pulled his hands away as they grazed two of the firmest yet pillowey-est mounds of flesh he had ever had the fortune of touching. He immediately knew what…or who this was.

“Hillary?!” He could just about see her features. Her face was pale, eyes closed, hair fanned out on the floor. Hilpot!!” He screamed, trying to shake her awake. She didn’t stir.

'Oh shit! Shit, shit, shit...What the fuck do I do??'

His eyes narrowed to the far side of the room. 

"Slick!..." Stumbled over and draped himself over the body. "Billy, old pal!" He slapped Bill's cheeks. "C'mon, wake up, you gotta wake up!....I'm gonna fuck Hillary!" Still,  an unresponsible Bill lay like dead weight.

Joe looked about frantically. His two best friends were lying in front of him, likely dying. And ther was nothing he could do.....or was there...

He frowned hard, thinking deeply. Taking a deep breath, he crawled towards Hillary. He put his ear to her mouth and felt a light warmth. She was breathing. Good. 

"Ok... here goes..."

Tilting Hillary's head back, Joe performed CPR. He alternated between chest compressions and mouth to mouth * ** _giggles_** *, for a full 15 mins. He almost gave up when Hillary sat up gasping and choking. At the very same moment, the whole room lit up brightly.

"Hilarious!" Joe exclaimed with utter joy before enveloping her into a bear hug. "I thought I lost you! I thought I lost you both!"

"Get..off me!..."Hillary pushed him off, eyes wide, chest heaving.

 Before he could respond, Bill shot up from his death or whatever the Hell it was, gasping in the same manner as Hillary.

"Bill! Oh my God, buddy! I thought you were a gonner! What the Hell happened to you??"

Bill looked at him in utter confusion. "Wh - Who are you?"

Joe squinted his face. "Some way to repay your pal for saving your life!"

"Well...who _are_ you?" Hillary asked tenatively. "And who is _he_?"

"Is this some sort of joke?" Joe asked suspiciously. "Waaaaaaiiittt....am I on candid camera??" His face beamed as he waved around the room. "Yeah, you got me!" He clicked his fingers and pointed.

Bill and Hillary exchanged glances. 'Who the fuck is this fruitcake?'

When neither joined him in confirming this, Joe realised something was indeed going on.

"You don't know how you are?" He asked BIll. Bill thought hard, but could come up with nothing.

"And _you_ don't know who _you_ are?" 

Hillary bit her lip, worry etched over her face. "No...I can't seem to remember..." her blue eyes imploring Joe for information.

"Aahh..ok. Well. You're Bill Clinton." He pointed to Bill. "The 42nd President of the US." 

Bill's face lit up and he beamed. "Me? The President?"

"Yessir...but I mean.. that was 10 years ago. You're a nobody _now_ ".  He then turned to Hillary. "And you my dear, are the current Secretary of State. "

Hillary's mouth gaped momentarily. "I am ?"

"You sure are doll," Joe draped his arm around Hillary's shoulder. "And this hero here," He cocked his thumb at himself "I'm the greatest ever Vice President this country has ever had the fortune of electing -"

"VP's aren't elect-"

"Shut up and be grateful asshole" Joe glared at Bill. "As I was _saying ,_ I'm Joe Biden. And you're Hillary. My wife." 

Both Hillary and Bill stood dumbfounded at Joe's revelation, whilst he looked back from one to the other, shit eating grin plastered over his face.

* * *

 

"So how can we get out of here...Joe" Hillary tacked on his name at the end. It still didn't feel natural saying it.

"Beats me, hun". Joe lay, stretched out onto the floor, eating cold ham. "Why don't you come give Daddy some sugar" he winked.

Her stomach felt odd. "Erm...maybe later...I don't feel so good."

Joe blew her an airkisss. "I'll hold you to it".

Hillary didn't respond. She spotted Bill pushing at a tiny rigde at the bottom of on of the walls, and walked over. She knelt down beside him. " Bill, is there anything I can help with?"

Bill smiled at her, his blue eyes sparkling. Hillary's heart jumped a little. 

"Sure Hillary, I feel a slight give here. I could be wrong but..." He kicked at the wall, but it made no mark. " I need something sharp..." He mused.

"You're not gonna get outta here, kids! Trust me, I've searched everywhere. Hill baby, Jr needs your kisses..." 

Hillary looked at Joe in disgust before turning to Bill. "How about my heel? ... It has a sharp edge..."

"Perfect! Thank you Hillary" 

She handed him her shoe, their fingers briefly touching. 

Bill's mouth suddely went dry. 'Focus Bill.' He dug Hillary's heel into the small ridge repeatedly until a small hole began to form in the wall.

"It's working Bill, it's working!" Hillary jumped excitedly.

"Do that again babe, you jiggle so good. Hehehe..."

"Joe, stop that!" Hillary chastised.

"Oh I'm only playing." He got up and walked over, pulling Hillary into his arms. "Nobody gets to see what I see." He looked pointedly at Bill. " _Nobody"._

Bill rolled his eyes and continued working on the small hole until he felt the foundations loosening. "Stand back". With all the force he could muster, Bill brought his foot down and smashed the section of the wall.

"Joe take my lead!" 

Nodding, Joe did exactly as Bill, taking turns until it happened.

"Oh my God. Look!" 

All three bent down to have a closer look.

"It-It looks like a tunnel of some sort..." Bill frowned. "Joe, Hill...you stay back here. I'll have a look."

"Ok".

Hillary smacked Joe on the head. "Idiot. No Bill, we go together."

Bill nodded. " Fine. Me first. Hillary, then you Joe."

"..But how do we know where it's taking us?" Joe asked, reasonably for a change.

"We don't...But we'll never know if we don't try..." Hillary looked at him, using her best puppy dog eyes.

"How could I refuse that face", Joe pinched her cheeks. "Ok, lets do this."


	7. Hotel, Motel, Holiday Inn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to Soraya13 for putting a fire under my ass.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy. <3

**_THUMP! THUMP! THUMP!_ **

“Wooo!” Joe screamed, landing right on his ass after Hillary landed on Bill. The two locked eyes, wanting to stare forever, but then they remembered that Hillary and Joe were married and decided to look away. “What the fuck is this?!” Joe yelped, seeing that they were in a hotel room.

Hillary swallowed, slowly dismounting Bill. “A bed,” she sighed, happy to see one. “I’m so exhausted.”

“Let me!” Joe screamed, running in front of her. “It’s your husband’s job to uh, tuck that ass into the sheets.” He wrapped his arm around the small of her waist. “Takes a strong man to lift all this succulence. A virile man. A fuckin’ Biden!” he said, glaring at Bill.

Bill furrowed his brow, fighting the urge to stare at Hillary’s hips.

“Just—let—me—“ Joe stammered, struggling to lift Hillary. “Fuck!” he yelped, hoisting her to the mattress. “Man, that succulence doesn’t come cheap!” he said, hand to his lower back.

She rolled her eyes, before staring at Bill’s backside. She noticed that it was nice and supple, and she forced herself to look away.

“The VP needs some ice,” Joe said, grabbing the container. “I’ll be back soon,” he cooed, blowing a kiss at Hillary. When he shut the door, Bill and Hillary looked towards the floor, wanting so badly to be close to each other.

“How long’ve you been married?” Bill asked, then shook his head. “Sorry, I forgot that you don’t—”

“Remember?” she asked, voice light and slightly aroused.

“Yeah,” he said, scratching his head. “Seems like he loves you a lot.”

“Does it?” she scoffed. “Something’s weird about him. I can’t put my finger on it, but I really doubt that I’d marry a guy like that.”

“Why do you think?”

“He’s…he’s not my type,” she said, making sure not to look at Bill. “I’m not attracted to him at all.”

Happy to hear the news, Bill swallowed, hoping that she fancied him. “Wh—what kinda guy are you usually attracted to?”

She looked down at her fingers, loving his southern accent. “Tall men, full head of hair, maybe even a little chubby.”

He looked down, happy about his paunch.

“And with kind eyes,” she continued, locking eyes with Bill. “And…”

“And what?” he asked, moving closer.

“I can’t say.”

He sat next to her, desperately wanting to touch her. “I won’t tell,” he drawled, moving her hair behind her ear. “I promise.”

She leaned into his hand, so impressed by the length of his fingers. “I like…butts.”

“Butts?”

“And…I cannot lie.” She looked down, grinning.

“Hillary?”

“Yeah?”

“I…I like butts, too. Big, round ones.”

She grinned. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

They moved in closer, only inches from each other. “Bill…”

“Hillary…”

“I…”

“I…”

“I’m back!” Joe said, kicking the door open and setting the ice on the table. “Can you believe I had to pay for all this shit?!” he screamed, tossing a pile of vending machine snacks on the dresser. “Good thing I swiped your wallet, Bill.” He threw the wallet back at Bill. “So, who wants to… _shower_?” he asked, gyrating. “I hope Hillary’ll say yes, but Bill, you can, too as long as you face the wall.” He licked his lips. “Nevermind,” he said, thinking it over. “I’ll be peeing in the corner.”

“Have you always been this crass?!” Hillary scoffed.

“What’s it to you, sexy?!”

“You’re making me sick! There’s no way we’re married!”

Incensed, Joe swiped the snacks from the dresser. “This is how you talk to me after 65 years of wedded bliss?! I should drag you in front of the priest for shame!”

“ _Sixty-five_?!” She became breathless, completely panicked. “How old am I, Joe?”

“How the fuck would I know?!”

“You said you’re my husband!”

“I’m not your mother!”

Bill did some quick calculations in his head before turning back to Hillary. “There’s no way Hillary’s a day over 40,” he said.

She grinned, fighting the urge to grab his hand.

“Yeah, right!” Joe screamed, Cheetos falling from his mouth. “She’s 72 _at least_ ,” he said, shaking his head.

“You…think I look young?” Hillary asked Bill, fingers inching towards him.

“I do,” he said, fingers getting closer to hers. “I also think you can do better,” he whispered, looking back at Joe.

She nodded, determined to make a better life for herself. “Joe, I’m leaving you.”

“What?!” he yelped, spitting out Diet Coke.

“You don’t respect me!”

“That’s what a _wife’s_ supposed to do! I ain’t no bitch!” he screamed, swiping the ice bucket across the room.

“Now you calm down!” Bill yelled, pissed at Joe’s tone towards Hillary. “If the lady wants a better life, she deserves it! If she’s spent the last forty years listening to your shit, then I applaud her for leaving!”

Joe grabbed Bill by the shirt, and the men started tussling. “Fuck—you—Bill!”

“Let—go—of—me!”

“She’s—fuckin’—mine!”

“Not—any—more!”

Hillary watched them with a small grin on her face, impressed by Bill’s strength.

“I’m—her—husband!” Joe stammered, squeezing Bill’s head.

“I—should—be!” Bill screamed, forcing Joe to the other side of the room.

Hillary’s eyes grew big when she heard it, and she was so touched. “You’d—you’d like to be my husband?” she asked, on her knees in the center of the mattress.

Bill wiped his bloody lip with the back of his hand. “I’d…love to be, Hillary. You’re beautiful.”

She looked down, so attracted to him and so aroused. “You really think that?”

“I do,” Bill drawled, walking towards her. “In fact, you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I’d marry you right now if I could.”

“ _Oh, fuuuuck_!” Joe screamed, punching the wall. “You two fucks get amnesia and _still_ wanna be together?!” He looked up. “What is this, Lord?! Punishment for all those bank robberies?!” He kicked the wall and instantly collapsed in pain. “Shit!”

Bill and Hillary couldn’t stop staring at each other. “Amnesia,” they said in unison, lips moving closer and closer. “That explains it,” they said again, amazed that they were on the same wavelength.

“Hillary…”

“Bill…”

The two kissed so passionately that when they pulled back, they struggled to catch their breaths.

“I’m sorry,” Bill said, remembering that she was still married.

“Don’t be.”

“But what about Joe?”

They looked in the man’s direction, finding him nearly naked with Goldfish surrounding his body. “We need to get rid of him,” Hillary said, eyes focused. “And after we do that,” she whispered, intertwining her fingers with Bill’s, “you and I can get to know each other better.”

Bill smiled, so happy to be with her.


	8. Sparks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @Soraya - I hope this will do, sadly it is not my best work !
> 
> @Anirtak - it all falls on you now....
> 
> Also, apologies for the typos. My eyes are barely open and I'm not on Word!

“There, that’ll keep him” Bill asserted as he pushed the small table in front of the bathroom door, the height being just enough to prevent the handle from turning and allowing Joe to open the door once he came out of his goldfish coma.  
   
Hillary bit her lip and suppressed a chuckle. She did feel a little guilty, after all, Joe was her husband. But the attraction that she felt for Bill was magnetic. She couldn’t help but be drawn to him. She licked her lips unconsciously as Bill stood to his full height and wiped the sweat off his brow. An unexpected stirring within her making her blush. She looked away quickly before it became obvious.  
   
Bill gulped down some water and leaned against the wall. She was looking out of the hotel window now. The light shining on her hair like a halo surrounding her. His eyes travelled down her body.  Her breasts were full and heaving just a little faster than normal breathing conditions would allow. Her waist tapered in seductively before blossoming out onto the juiciest ass he had ever laid eyes on. God, he wanted to feast on that peach right now! But, he would be a gentleman. She was still married to his apparent best friend… for some reason. And he would respect that.  
   
Hillary turned around.  
“Thank you, Bill. I – I think my request for a divorce must have upset him so much he had to eat all 28 packets. I’m sure he’ll feel calmer after sleeping it off”.  
She could feel her face was flushed. She felt so hot suddenly. She wanted to rid herself of her layers however realised she was only wearing a thin blouse and light trousers.  
   
Bill groaned out loud as the outside light reflected off the sheen of perspiration that was now covering her décolletage, making her breasts look fuller and bouncier. He felt the crotch of his trousers suddenly feel tighter.  
   
Hillary turned around sharply. “Bill are you alright?”

“Ah…Yeah, yeah I’m good.” He turned his body so that his bulge would not be evident. He bent his large frame over slightly to try and conceal this.  
   
Hillary mistook his action as an indication of pain and rushed over. She placed her hand on her forearm and looked up at him. “Bill, what’s wrong?”  
   
Bill looked into her bright blue eyes and felt his situation get worse. An image he would never even have dreamed of before this evening…he assumed, flashed before his eyes. Hillary, on her knees in front of him, his thick cock in her mouth, those beautiful blue eyes looking up at him innocently…  
He shook his head. ‘For fuck sake Bill!’ he yelled at himself.  
   
“Bill maybe you should sit down…” Hillary said, concerned and pulled him to the bed. It was then that she saw it. Gasping and letting go of his hand.  
   
Bill was mortified. “Hillary, I’m so sorry...It’s not you – I – I mean it is you but – but I promise I would never act out of turn or inappropriately”. He stammered.  
Silence surrounded them as Hillary stood, shocked. Bill cursed himself and his raging libido.  
   
Then she spoke. “I want you to.” It was barely audible.  
Bill’s ears pricked up. He wasn’t sure he had heard what he thought he heard. “ I’m sorry…Wh-what did you say?” His voice was barely a squeak.

Hillary swallowed and sat on the bed slowly. "I want  you to... Act on your feelings, I mean..."  She surprised herself in saying this. The words came out easily, no guilt attached to them. Was she always this easy? Had she cheated on Joe before?? Hillary swatted those thoughts away as at this momen, she knew it had to be him. Bill Clinton. It was inexplicable, but felt right.

"Hill, are you sure? I mean, Joe's just -"

Hillary took hold of his hand and  guided him onto the bed  to sit next to her. "I don't want to think about this Bill. Please..." 

Bill didn't need told twice. He knew she was something special the moment he laid eyes on her.  He clasped Hillary's smaller hand into his and stroked gently. Hillary shivered as this sent goosebumps down her back. She licked her lips nervously. His mouth was so close she could feel his breath. 

His mouth hovered over hers before Bill decided to take the plunge. His heart nearly burst out of his chest. Her lips were so soft. He felt her open her mouth a little, inviting his tonge in. He obliged of course. Their tongues massaged the other's in a long, sensual, languid kiss. She moaned into his mouth. The vibrations going straigh to his already straining cock.

In one swift motion, Bill flipped HIllary over, laying her on the bed as he straddled her. Her golden lockes fanned out on the bed as she looked at him through sexy hooded lids.

"Joe's right about one thing - you're so fucking hot".  He muttered before tearing her blouse open. He could  have unbuttoned it like a gentlemen, but the need was too intense. His eyes nearly popped out of his head as Hillary's full breasts stared back at him, covered only by the flimsiest of lace. How in the world did it support those jewels??

The throbbing in his loins reminded him that there was an even greater conquest. He pulled down Hillary's trousers and pants in one swift motion. It was all he could do to not cum there and then. There she lay, the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on, almost naked save for her torn blouse and lacy bra. He was pleasantly surprised to see that she was fully waxed, allowing him to see her juices glistening.... ready for him.

"Bill...take me..." She whispered. Hillary was ready for this. She needed  him. She gasped out loud as Bills painfully erect cock came into view. She was sure she could see it pulsing. His head, swollen and tight. She licked her lips as he postioned himself between her waiting legs and pulled her down to meet his dick. She yelped in surprise and excitement, turning into a groan as her throbbing pussy made contact with his solid memeber. "Oh...Yes Bill..."

Hearing her willingness only spured on Bill more. He positioned his dick at the opening of her pussy and pushed. A little at first. He could see that he was a large man.

Hillary gasped as she felt her pussy open up and stretch around the biggest thing she had ever recalled feeling inside of her. A low whine escaped her as she felt Bill push further and further inside her until he could go no further. He stilled, allowing her to get accustomed to the sensation of this extreme fullness.

Both assumed that this would not be the case at their ages, however this moment felt like the first time for either of them. A second deflowering.

Once Bill felt her relax,  he leaned forward, taking her mouth into another kiss as he pulled almost all the way out, before thrusting back in. Hillary hooked her legs around his waist as he built up a steady pace.

The room was soon filled with the sounds of sex - heavy breathing, groaning, cursing. 

Hillary couldn't control herself. She could feel herself building slowly but surely towards her release as Bill pummelled into her like a mad man. 

"Bill" She panted "I'm going to cum... I'm so close"

Bill, who was not too far from his own release encouraged her. " Good girl, cum for me, come all over my dick. Feel me inside of you. Feel how good we are together baby..."

Bill's words spurred her orgasm closer.

Suddenly the room began to shake, the walls rumbled noisily and the lights flashed erratically. And stopped just as abruptly.

Bill stopped and looked up shocked and concerned 'What the fu--"

Hillary didn't have time for this. She needed her release. "Bill..." 

She squeeezed her pussy around his dick. "Fuck me Billy..."

Not one to let a woman in distress down, Bill did just that. Harder, faster. He could feel Hillary get wetter and slicker. Her pussy gripping around him even tighter.

"Yes... keep going..." She was almost there. The coil deep within her began to unravel, sending jolts of pleasure throught her whole body, until, it exploded. A blinding white overcame her, she screamed out loud and uninhibited. Then it hit her.... "Bill? It's you..." She whispered in bliss, riding through her orgasm

Bill cursed as he felt Hillary clamp down on his cock as he body went rigid from pleasure. He felt his own release come on as his balls tightened and a rush of pleasure run along his memeber and shoot deep into her. "Hillary...Rodham Clinton...You're mine..." He proclaimed in realisation.

The room began to shake and rumble yet again, however instead of light, they were enveloped in darkness. Both clung to one another as air wooshed around them. Neither spoke, too spent from their respective orgasms. White lights flashed intermittently as the air around them vibrated. Electricity sparked in the air.

Finally, the noises, the sensations all halted.

Bill was the first to look up, blinking at their surroundings. 

"Oh my God..."

Hillary, who had hidden her face in the crook of his neck dreaded what she might see. She was too caught in her lovemaking with Bill to consider that fact they she could end up anywhere ... again, but naked!

"Bill...Where are we?" Her voice came out muffled.

"It's ok honey... we're home...We're Home!" He yelled in joy, finally pullng out of Hillary and rolling over on their own bed.

Both looked at one another in bewilderement. Was this it? Was this the end of this insanity?

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Hillary looked up at Bill alarmed, covering herself with a sheet. 

"Bill! You better let me outta here  you fucker! I told you I didn't want to be a part of your little mind fuck session...And why the fuck are my aviators cracked!!"

Hillary narrowed her eyes and turn to Bill slowly. "Bill... What is Joe talking about?" Her tone indicating she was not about to accept just any old bullshit from her husband.


	9. The Final Mindfuck!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the end. I can only shake my head.

Miffed, Bill stood. “Dammit!”

“Let me out of here, you bastard!”

“Bill?” Hillary asked, watching him put his hand on the closet’s knob.

He took a breath. “Baby, I locked Joe in the closet earlier because he said he never experienced darkness before.”

“I still haven’t, fucker! I  _am_  the darkness.”

“Shut the hell up, Biden!”

Joe fell quiet, and Hillary covered herself more, knowing that Joe would love a sneak peak. Bill opened the door, and Joe gasped, holding his chest.

“There’s no air in there!” he yelped.

Hillary rolled her eyes.

“Hilton!” Joe screaned, sweaty. “You have something on your…” He wagged his finger up and down in her direction.

“On my what?” she asked, looking around.

“Right there,” he said, pointing all over the place. “Hurry up and get it off!”

“What?!” she screamed, jumping out of bed. Her covering fell to the floor.

“Ahhh…” Joe said, wiping his brow. He burst into tears, sobbing from joy. “I’ve waited my whole fucking life to see your bare ass!”

“Fucker!” Bill screamed, punching Joe. “Cover up, Hillary!”

“I’m trying,” she said, moving slowly. “But I can’t see without my glasses.”

“Then feel around!”

“Get—off—of—me—you—bastard!”

“Close—your—fucking—eyes!” Bill screamed.

“Even—if—I—did—I—can—see—with—them—closed! Didn’t—you—know—I—have—super—powers?!”

“No, you don’t!” Bill screamed, squeezing Joe’s head.

“I do!”

“You don’t!”

“Enough!” Hillary screamed, finally wrapping herself in the blanket again. “Why can’t you ever be in a room together without fighting? It’s sick! You’re nearly the same age, a part of the same party, and at least have the same sexual interests. Why do you hate each other so much?!”

Bill and Joe looked at each other, their hair out of place.

“You tell her,” Joe mumbled.

“No, you tell her.”

“She’s _your_ wife,” Joe scoffed.

“She’s your crush!”

“But I don’t get to bang her, fucker! It’s your job to let her know why!”

“Take it back!”

“Never! I’ve been dreaming of that succulence since the Spring of 1971!”

Bill gasped. “That’s when _I_ met the girl!”

“Use it in a future DNC speech, fucker! No one else cares!”

“Bill!” Hillary screamed, snatching his chin.

“Ahh!”

“Tell me!”

“Okay!” Bill yelped. Hillary begrudgingly let him go. “…fuck,” he mumbled, holding his face. “Fine. The beef started when—“

“You’re a liar, fucker!”

“Do you wanna tell it?!”

“Hell yeah!” Joe said. “Hillpot, baby, listen alright?” he cooed, hands on her shoulders. He swallowed. “Back in 1992…”

“It was before!”

“Fine!” Joe screamed. “Back in 1992…”

Bill rolled his eyes.

“Billinda over there became president. I couldn’t believe it myself. I stayed up all night flipping the channels and checking the remote batteries because each fucking station said _THAT_ country bumpkin was gonna be the leader of the free world! I became dizzy. Jill had to give me some of her pills. She’s a doctor, you know.”

“Hurry up!”

“So I called him!” Joe screamed. “Back then we didn’t have cellphones, so I had my honing pigeon send him a rotary phone that was connected to a secure line. Unfortunately, the pigeon died from exhaustion.”

Hillary closed her eyes.

“When the fucker answered, well, I said…”

“He said, ‘How the fuck did YOU get to be president, you cheese eating bastard! I rigged it for Ross Perot! If he wasn’t so short he could’ve reached the voting pull, cast the final decision, and dragged your ass to hell!”

Joe looked down.

“Can you believe that shit, Hillary?! The day I get to the White House, he called me up to insult me! But before that—“

“You’re a liar!” Joe screamed.

“No, I’m not!”

“You are!” He turned to Hillary. “That was it, Hilton. Don’t listen to anything he says!”

“At the Governor’s Luncheon of 1980—!”

“Shut up, Billpot!”

“He tried to kill me!”

Hillary gasped, and Bill grinned.

“It’s true, Hillary,” he said, hugging her while grinning slyly at Joe. “He made sure to hand me a glass of pure cows milk.”

“Liar!”

“And then,” Bill cooed, feeling Hillary up, he got pissed when I didn’t take a sip.”

“She should’ve been mine!” Joe screamed. “What do you even see in him, Hillsex?! He has a full head of hair! It’s unnatural!”

“Get out,” Hillary demanded.

“But…”

“Out!”

Joe looked down. “Fine.” He was sullen. “I’m out of your life forever, Billary. You won’t hear from Ol’ Joe ever again.”

Bill and Hillary looked at each other.

“It’s true!” Joe yelped, shaking his fists in the air. “This is the end!”

The couple felt bad, and talked to each other with their eyes.

“Here I am, sixty-fucking-something years old, maybe, and I lose my best friends!” As he kept crying, Joe looked down at Bill’s wallet, giddy about the excessive amount of cash. “So, bye old friends! I hope the door hits you where the Good Lord split you!”

“ _You’re_ the one who’s leaving,” Bill said.

Joe furrowed his brow and put the wallet in his pocket. “You’re right, Thumbillina. You’re always right.” Giddy, Joe ran off without any further discussion.

“Well?” Hillary asked.

“Well what?”

She took a breath. “We ended up in some kind of dream sequence _slash_ mind fuck scenario. I mean, I know we fucked but—“

Bill swallowed, holding to her wrist. “Hillary…are you telling me that you wanna fuck again?”

She looked down. “Yes.”

Bill’s eyes grew big.

“It was all mythical, Bill. I have needs.”

“YES!” he screamed, snatching off her sheet. “Fuck the mindfuck, Hill! This is better than Christmas!”

“Hurry up, Billy!”

Giddy, Bill turned to the readers. “This is so great, that I should order my girl a pizza.” He looked for his wallet. “Hey!”

“What?”

“He stole my fucking wallet!”

“He _what_?”

“Joe!” Bill screamed, running out of the house. “Joe, you fucker!”

Hillary sat on the edge of the bed and shook her head. “If you want something done, you have to do it yourself,” she scoffed, opening the nightstand drawer. “Thank God for Sharper Image,” she said, plugging in her Hitachi Wand.


End file.
